http://robynslingsby.co.uk/index.php en robyn@robynslingsby.co.uk Copyright 2010 2010-09-03T12:04:50+00:00 http://robynslingsby.co.uk/index.php/site/five_for_friday_-_dream_jobs/ http://robynslingsby.co.uk/index.php/site/five_for_friday_-_dream_jobs/#When:12:04:50Z Eek, I got so carried away with wedding plans last Friday - tying bows, snowflake holepunchs and guillotines etc - that I totally forgot to post my Five for Friday. So, in true recycling style, here is the post I was supposed to publish last Friday, and it’s all about dream jobs. If I hadn’t decided on a career in journalism when I left college at 18, what would I have done instead? I haven’t mentioned book shop owner as that was a previous post, so,  in an ideal world, it would probably be one of these things: 1) An FBI agent. I watch way too many American cop/detective shows and read too many US crime novels but would love to get entangled in the law, hunt down criminals and look into the psychology of crime. A criminal profiler would be cool. I think it’s unlikely..  for starters I’m not American but M15 doesn’t sound anywhere near as exciting as the FBI. Freeze! *points imaginary gun and aims* 2) A novelist. Note that this comes after an FBI agent – being a full time writer is likely to make me fat and lazy with lots of afternoon power naps; being in “the bureau” is likely to burn off more calories. But to wake up each morning, read the newspapers, sit behind my desk while still in my jim jams and write all day would be bliss. Not easy, but bliss. After a lunch time stroll with the dog to buy a paper I’d snuggle up on the sofa with the laptop and Murder She Wrote on the TV and write some more. And if the writing wasn’t happening (which it so often doesn’t with me) then I’d do research and editing instead. Bliss. Oh, and don’t forget the fabulous cocktail-filled launch parties I’d attend and literary festivals I’d be guest speaking at. 3) A detective. Not your average detective but maybe a freelance one like Sherlock Holmes, with the ability and sixth sense to sniff out clues and track down the perpetrators of heinous crimes. I’m scared of the sight of blood and pass out when I see a needle but, that aside, I’d love to get drawn into the criminal underworld and emerge a hero. 4) Food critic. How ace would it be to spend your working hours in restaurants, bars and cafes sampling food and writing reviews? Possibly not the best job for the waistline, but great fun. Then I’d like to be one of the judges on Masterchef and put contestants through their paces. Awesomeness! 5) Design agency. I’d write and design leaflets, brochures, business cards and websites and be utterly creative all day long. I’d launch my own brand of trendy office stationery and create handmade cards and invitations. I’d have a really bright and colourful office with funky furniture, the biggest stationery cupboard you’ve ever seen and a really cool editing suite. That’s it for me. What about you? What’s your dream job? Picture by cliff1066™  via Flickr under Creative Commons licence 2010-09-03T12:04:50+00:00 http://robynslingsby.co.uk/index.php/site/five_for_friday_why_i_cant_wait_for_christmas/ http://robynslingsby.co.uk/index.php/site/five_for_friday_why_i_cant_wait_for_christmas/#When:13:17:41Z Sorry, I know it’s a bit early for festive-themed blog posts but this week my Five for Friday is all about wanting December to roll around in a hurry. Here’s why: 1) Because I love Christmas in general and all the magic that goes with it. The scrumptious food, the coffee with amaretto and cream, the homemade mince pies and mulled wine. The sparkly lights, the wicked music, roaring log fires, perfectly wrapped presents, shopping trips, snow and festive films like The Hogfather, Santa Claus The Movie and Miracle on 34th Street. Christmas rocks. 2) This year, for the first year since I moved out of mum’s place at the age of 20, I get to celebrate Christmas in my own home. I’ve always travelled back to the shire for Christmas, to spend it with mum or dad or both (but not at the same time, that’s divorce for you). So that means living out of a bag for a few days and loading my car with presents and having to make a long drive on Christmas Eve as I’m a couple of hours away from the shire. There have been two Christmases not spent in the shire, but abroad, in Morrocco a few years back, which was horrific and the Maldives last year, which was nice but it rained and I was terribly homesick. This year, Christmas is at my house so I don’t need to pack a bag, can wake up on Christmas Day in my very own bed and open presents under my very own tree, watch TV and fall asleep on my very own sofa having eaten a festive lunch at my very own dining table. That said, it means I’ll have my very own huge heap of washing up to contend with too! 3) This is also the first Christmas that I’ll have spent with my beloved. Last year, our first Christmas, was spent thousands of miles away from each other with only Skype and text messaging for comfort. He was in Dorset with his family and I was on a tiny island in the Maldives with mine. Don’t get me wrong, the Maldives is gorgeous and the resort was amazing but when you’re crazy in love with someone, the only place you want to be is in their arms, be it on a sandy beach in the middle of the Indian Ocean or sat on a bench outside MacDonalds in Milton Keynes. 4) The fact that I spotted Christmas wrapping paper in the garden centre the other week and have seen festive party menus lying around in pubs and restaurants means the countdown to Christmas has begun, and therefore to my wedding day. I’m getting married in early December and can’t wait so every signal, like “book your Christmas party now” advertisments, the leaves falling off the trees, colder weather ad darker nights will all be signs that my wedding day is drawing nearer and I can open a new chapter in my life with a new surname. I wouldn’t usually wish time away like this but if we could fast forward to November right now, I’d be very happy. 5) What follows most weddings is a honeymoon and I can’t wait for mine. After the organisational mission required to make an actual wedding happen, me and my beloved will be looking forward to a much needed week in Hawaii, soaking up some sunshine, spotting whales and turtles, tackling hikes along the volcanic seascape and sipping on cocktails under the palm trees. And then, even better than that, all refreshed and raring to go, we’ll be spending our final week in New York, a place we both love and where we shared our first holiday together. And, even better, NYC at Christmas time is going to be magical… I keep thinking about the scene in Elf where he and his new girlfriend look at the tree outside the Rockefeller Center and I want me and Rich to do that too. Picture of the Christmas tree outside New York’s Rockefeller Center, by Huron Tours & Travel via Flickr under Creative Commons licence 2010-08-20T13:17:41+00:00 http://robynslingsby.co.uk/index.php/site/dead..._but_without_the_a/ http://robynslingsby.co.uk/index.php/site/dead..._but_without_the_a/#When:14:34:03Z Twelve years ago today it was me collecting my A Level results. I bumped into my netball coach on the way into the library, she grinned at me and said “you’ve done well”, so I beamed back and got a little bit excited. I think I was predicted Bs and Cs, possibly an A in English if I pulled my socks up. Turns out my socks had deserted me. My A Level results spelled DEAD… but without the A. I was gutted, not because it meant I wouldn’t get into uni or get the career of my dreams, but because they were crap grades. Okay, so I paid no attention what so ever in economics, actually quit law for a month or so and then returned to it and was considered a “natural and pithy” writer in English language and literature and therefore didn’t try very hard. So it was my own fault, but still. I was considered quite bright and this, I felt, was a poor representation of my intelligence. It didn’t matter though, I’d already bagged a place on an in-house journalism training scheme – that I got paid to do – and had no intention of going to university anyway. Academia wasn’t for me, I wanted to graft. And since then, not one single employer has ever asked what grades I got at A Level. My CV lists my A Level passes, of course, but I have never included the grades because they’re not very good. I’ve been working since I was 18 – so 12 years – and those A Level results haven’t mattered one jot. Neither, come to mention it, does the fact I don’t have a degree. I have been asked about it but saying variations of “well, I don’t have a degree but I have three more years of on-the-job experience than any graduate my age” has always done the trick. I’m not saying don’t go to university, it’s a great thing to do – to learn, expand your mind, make new friends and find out what you really want a career in. I always knew… it was journalism or being an Olympic 100-metre sprinter, but I never made it out of the blocks on the latter! Picture of Ludlow College, by James F Clay via Flickr under Creative Commons licence 2010-08-19T14:34:03+00:00 http://robynslingsby.co.uk/index.php/site/5_for_friday_-_similarities_between_dog_ownership_and_writing/ http://robynslingsby.co.uk/index.php/site/5_for_friday_-_similarities_between_dog_ownership_and_writing/#When:13:23:03Z Okay, 5 for Friday is a new addition to my blog and will occur once a week – on a Friday as it happens, hence the title. Having got my inspiration from Talli Roland’s 10 for Tuesday, here’s my first 5 for Friday, this week on the similarities between owning a dog and writing. In July, Ralphie the cocker spaniel (pictured) came into our lives and it’s been a combo of joy and mayhem ever since. I’m also bumbling along with my first novel and there are plenty of comparisons between the two. Here are five of them: Chasing your tail Ralphie loves to chase his tail round and round in circles. I have no idea if he realises his tail is actually attached to him because he never quite manages to get it, but it gives me endless amusement to watch him do it. I’m always chasing my tail with my writing too. I’m always fail to meet my own deadlines and never seem to make as much progress as I’d like. Every time I set time aside to write, something crops up and I rarely get the quality time I need to crack on. The author Kate Mosse once said, even if you write for 10 minutes a day it’ll make a difference. I’m not sure I agree though, I need hours! There’s a lot of poo As with any new puppy, toilet training is part of the deal – wees and poos, with the odd dicky tummy to boot. Bless. While I’ve cleaned up a fair lot of poo these past weeks, at least I haven’t trodden in one bare foot (can’t say the same for my other half though!). With writing there is a lot of poo too – just because people are “writers” it doesn’t mean everything they write is good, far from it. I sometimes re-read chapters and yelp in horror at the awfulness of my prose. So I guess part of writing a novel is about clearing up the poop, sifting out the crap words, characters and plot lines so only the good ones remain. Sleepless nights While Ralphie doesn’t give us sleepless nights, as such (unless he has a dodgy tum), he does cry to be let out for a wee. It’s usually around 6am but can be as early as 3am so I stumble downstairs, bleary eyed, to chuck him out the back door, wait til he’s done his business and return us both to bed. In the midst of writring my novel, especially the first draft, I would wake at 3am with an idea I just had to write down. No idea why this happened, or if it happens to anyone else, but, like with dreams, I was worried if I went back to sleep I’d forget the idea. To save me stumbling about in the dark I now keep a notepad and pen by my bedside so I can scrawl notes in my semi slumber. Hard work and takes time There’s nothing easy about owning a dog. Like babies, they need almost constant attention and rely on you to be fed, watered, loved and raised. Despite being completely prepared for Ralphie’s arrival, we were still pretty frazzled after he moved in. He brings us bags of joy though and is totally worth it. Not only does he need our attention he also needs our time, to play with him and teach him things. Ralphie already knows sit, wait, off, paw, wee wees and din dins and tonight he’ll get to learn walkies! Writing is also hard work and takes time (even though I have a friend who can knock out novels over a weekend). I’m sure people think you just sit there, type a load of works and voila! There’s your novel, get it off to the publishers and Bob’s your uncle! If only. It’s all about planning, plotting, researching, writing, re-writing, plotting some more, editing, subbing, deleting, re-writing, editing.. and that’s before you even think about which agent to approach. Creativity Especially pre-jabs, Ralphie required entertaining indoors. He soon got bored with squeaky toys, dog chews, fetch and cuddles, so we needed to get creative. He now loves chasing star-shaped ice cubes around the kitchen floor (and they does wonders for his teething); he relishes the task of running upstairs and trying to find at least one stray sock to pinch; he gets so excited when you chase him round the garden with a broom; and if you make funny noises he’ll dive at your face to give you a wet, sloppy kiss. Next up we’re going to introduce the “find the cheese” game. Writing’s all about creativity too, you need to create characters with personalities, plot lines, sub plots and flowing text. You need to create a theme for your book, the emotional journeys your characters go on and, of course, the title of the book. Writing, fiction at least, is all about the creativity, and those creative juices don’t always flow. 2010-08-13T13:23:03+00:00 http://robynslingsby.co.uk/index.php/site/the_gop_pile/ http://robynslingsby.co.uk/index.php/site/the_gop_pile/#When:12:51:22Z When I worked at The Newport Advertiser in Shropshire we had this little thing going on called The Gop Pile. This was a pile of anything we came across that was “gopping”. So, for example, when someone wrote up a property report and said there was a “large widow overlooking the rear garden and ceramic tiled flashbacks” (they meant window and splashbacks), this was printed off and popped on the gop pile. So stories which contained snippets about icecream Sundays (sundaes – this was my own error), canal toepaths (towpaths) and head ponchos (honchos) was collated. When the then deputy editor left – the man who masterminded the gop pile – I took over his position and the gop with it. I started a “funnies board” in which we posted such comedy – but easy to make – errors. But what a great word – gop. In the urban dictionary it means something nasty or horrible, dripping with rancid fluid or discharge and this last one, which is too crude to mention. Gopping, to us, just meant an amusing or basic error. We always said we’d collect all the gop and turn it into a book one day… but we never did. Another of our Tizer (Advertiser) phrases was “Friday jobs” referring to small admin tasks which could be left until the end of the week. On a weekly newspaper no hard graft was done on a Friday, it was a chill out and catch your breath kind of day. And “special friend” referred to someone you completely disliked but who bugged you on a regular basis. Recently I’ve started using the word “uber” quite a lot, which is actually uber annoying. And my other half’s fondness of the word “lush” seems to have rubbed off on me; anything I now like a lot gets the lush label. Other words I use a lot are: Cripes No way, Jose Nicey micey Yummers Wicked The poo trail (where my dog likes to sniff for what seems like an age before he actually gets round to pooping) Batmobile (my car) Wanger (this features in my book – A LOT. You can probably work it out) Bow wow (dog) Wack wack (duck) Oh poo plops (polite way of saying oh shit) What funny sayings/words do you use regularly? Image by gadl via Fickr under Creative Commons licence   2010-08-10T12:51:22+00:00 http://robynslingsby.co.uk/index.php/site/dignity_and_moral_seriousness_pah/ http://robynslingsby.co.uk/index.php/site/dignity_and_moral_seriousness_pah/#When:12:45:36Z Come December I’ll be creating “an atmosphere of narcissism and self-promotion”, or so Rev Dr Giles Fraser, Canon Chancellor of St Paul’s Cathedral, would have me believe. His concern is that weddings have actually become a threat to marriage because they’re more about keeping up appearances than sharing the rest of your life with the one you love. Most clergy prefer to take funerals over weddings, he claims, because brides are more concerned with being a “princess for a day” than with the “dignity and moral seriousness” required when you get hitched. Well, I don’t want to be a princess, even just for one day – I hate long dresses, am not keen on pink or tiaras and neither am I overly girly; that’s just me. But I do think the bride and groom – so long as they’re marrying for the right reasons – should make their special day whatever they want it to be. And if butterflies and bling is their thing, so be it. The average cost of a wedding is £20,000 and that’s a whole lot of moolah to throw at just one day. It’s easy to see how brides can get wrapped up in the little things – table decorations, name place holders and wedding favours etc – which can cost the earth. The most important thing about my wedding is that I’m marrying the man I want to spend the rest of my life with. I see us walking down the street hand in hand when we’re 70, sharing fish and chip suppers together during an organised coach trip to the seaside, and baking cakes with our grandchildren. Aside from that, I’d like all my favourite people (the ones I know, at least; I don’t think Angela Lansbury can make it) to be there to help us celebrate our wedding day and I’ll do what I can, within budget, to make it enjoyable for them too. Our money is being spent on what means most to us. We love food, so want to make the wedding breakfast a tasty one. Certain music holds sentimental meaning to us and these songs will be played at the wedding. We love Christmas and this will be reflected on the day. These are just the aesthetics but the point of the whole day is that I’m marrying my soulmate. But if Dr Giles thinks taking the fun out of it – the nice dresses, twinkly lights and dancing – is going to make a marriage last longer, I think he’s a tad misguided. I’m not one for horse-drawn carriages, gold-lined marquees and diamond tiaras but if that’s what you’re into, then so be it. As long as you wholeheartedly want to spend your life with the person you say “I do” to, then how you celebrate your day is completely down to you. On the other hand, if it’s the wedding you want and not the marriage, save yourself some money and throw a huge party instead! Picture by SimonShaw via Flickr under Creative Commons licence 2010-08-06T12:45:36+00:00 http://robynslingsby.co.uk/index.php/site/so_chick_lits_dead_is_it/ http://robynslingsby.co.uk/index.php/site/so_chick_lits_dead_is_it/#When:15:52:32Z Some days I think about jacking it all in. Not life, obviously, but writing a novel. It’s so, so hard. Everyone always says how hard it is and you never quite believe them. I actually do know how hard it is and yet, there’s still a small part of me that thinks, what the hell, just send off the first three chapters and see how it goes. But, no. I have so much more work to do. I love my concept but my main character, Ronnie, is a hypocrital snob when she’s meant to be a likeable heroine of dating, and her dates are pretty… well, boring… reflecting my own personal experiences of dating but perhaps not the recipe for great reading. And she needs to have more of an emotional journey during the novel, rather than just appearing the other side of a high cholesterol dating diet with just a few bruises, mental scars and unwanted friends on Facebook. I know what I need to do, but writing isn’t happening of late and I haven’t really been trying hard enough to. What I have been doing is working on the core of my character – who she really is – by asking myself these 100 questions (some of which I still don’t know the answers to). I’m avoiding crime fiction, my genre of choice when it comes to reading, in favour of chick lit for inspiration and motivation. Oh, sorry, chick lit is dead apparently so I can’t use that phrase. I mean, of course, contemporary women’s literature don’t I? Even though they are EXACTLY the same thing! But hey, ho. Currently I’m half way through Gemma Burgess’s The Dating Detox and also enjoy her blog which offers up some useful tips for the tiring wannabe novelist. I’ve also discovered the blog of Talli Roland which makes me feel all insecure about my own blog and its crappy content. Hers is so lively and inspiring and mine is so dull and pointless. Yes, I’m having a “feel sorry for myself” moment but don’t worry, it’ll pass. While I hate that there are so many talented writers out there, it also motivates me to pull out the elbow grease and work just as hard as they do. Over and out… for now. Picture by Alex E. Proimos via Fickr under Creative Commons licence   2010-08-04T15:52:32+00:00 http://robynslingsby.co.uk/index.php/site/writers_simply_do_what_they_can/ http://robynslingsby.co.uk/index.php/site/writers_simply_do_what_they_can/#When:11:57:29Z It’s not often I talk about work on this blog but this week I interviewed Open University honorary graduate Zoe Wicomb. She’s a published author and teacher of creative writing so it was impossible not to ask her about her writing. Fine by me - as a newbie novel writer myself, her words are particularly relevant. “What we all have to do is to press on. Writing is an act of faith; we have to keep doing it even when it doesn’t appear to be going in the right direction, or keep on trying when it’s not going at all… writers simply do what they can,” says Zoe. So true. Read the full interview here. Picture by Aaron Jacobs via Flickr under Creative Commons licence 2010-07-27T11:57:29+00:00 http://robynslingsby.co.uk/index.php/site/puppy_power_a_guest_post/ http://robynslingsby.co.uk/index.php/site/puppy_power_a_guest_post/#When:14:41:19Z Guest blog post by Ralphie Bateman... Hi. I’m a nine week-old cocker spaniel and my name is…. er.. actually I don’t know what my name is yet. A couple of weeks ago I left my brothers, sisters and mum (I never knew my dad, he left before I was born) and moved in with my new parents. They’re cool, although they don’t have as much hair as me, and they have a nice house with lots of things to play with. I’m particularly keen on putting things in my mouth and chewing them, it feels good! I love my new parents and I get a bit upset when one of them leaves. It’s even worse when they’re both away and I’m on my own, that makes me cry a lot, but sometimes the neighbours pop round to say hello. They have a dog too but he’s much bigger than me and could probably eat me for breakfast. My parents keep saying things to me and I wish I could understand. “No”, seems to be their favourite word but I haven’t worked out what that means yet. They say “sit” a lot too and “wee wees” and “din dins” but it’s all jibberish to me. But when they shout Ralphie and open their arms out to me I always run and greet them and then they give me lots of fuss, which I like. I get lots of fuss after pooing and weeing sometimes too but I can’t work out why I do and then why I don’t. Sometimes I get fuss and a treat, other times I don’t. All I know is when I’ve got to go I’ve got to go, you know what I mean? I don’t often get time to think about it and sometimes I’m just so excited that I can’t hold onto it a second longer. And I really love the chase the kitchen roll game when mum or dad wipes up one of my wees. It’s great –I try and attack it and they try and push me out the way and sometimes they use a bottle of spray and I try and bite it. Woof! Last night I met some other dogs and it was pretty scary. Bar one they were all bigger than me so I hid under the chair for a lot of the time. The other dogs were biting and hitting each other and chasing each other round, which I didn’t want any part of. There were lots of treats there, which was nice, and I got a lot of strokes and fuss from some children as well as my parents and someone called The Vet, I guess the other dogs weren’t so bad, they just wanted to play, but one of them pawed me in the eye and made me cry a bit. It hurt! Sometimes the big dogs sat on their owners’ laps and me and another little dog, a tiny weeny one, could roam around without being pounced on. That was quite nice and I started wagging my tail again, but I was still a bit nervous and glad when it was all over. I was shattered and slept all the way home in the car. I’m learning lots of things too. I can now jump up the step to go outside and I know if I use the beanbag I can get up on the settee. I can also gallop up the stairs now but I haven’t figured out how to get down and that makes me cry. I also know that when my parents are in the kitchen, sometimes I get a bowl of food, so I whimper at them to hurry them along. A puppy’s gotta eat, right? One of my favourite things is to curl up on mum or dad’s lap, or on the floor by their feet, and go to sleep. Dad’s got big hairy toes which are great for resting my head on. I dream of bones and hope my new parents don’t mind that I sometimes snore. 2010-07-15T14:41:19+00:00 http://robynslingsby.co.uk/index.php/site/what_a_year/ http://robynslingsby.co.uk/index.php/site/what_a_year/#When:13:59:59Z Tomorrow I will have been with my beloved for one whole year. Not only that, it’s the day I get to try on my actual wedding dress, the one I’ll walk down the aisle in, AND the day our wedding rings arrive too. Spooky or what! So, wow. Just wow, seriously. In one year I have gone from uber independent singleton to engaged dog owner. In just 365 days I moved a man into my bachelorette pad, shared three holidays with him, met each other’s friends and families, accepted his romantic marriage proposal, moved to a country cottage together and invested in a gorgeous Cocker Spaniel puppy called Ralphie. It’s been a busy but amazing year and in just under five months I’ll be tying the knot and getting a brand new surname to boot. So, with virtual glass of champers in hand, here’s to the best year ever - and I make no apologies for being smug :0) 2010-07-09T13:59:59+00:00